Rachel Hart-Julie

Ashley Boulet-Amy

Morris P. Hingle-Brian

Principal Prickly and Mr Lawson (Lawson's dad)-Wiseguy

Ashley Armbruster-Emma

Mr Hart (Rachel's dad)-Dallas


Lawson and Rachel get in big trouble for ranting on the Hingle slash Boulet relationship.


In Principal Prickly's office, Principal Prickly was bored.

Principal Prickly: Man! I am so hungry! I shall go to the cafeteria and buy some lunch. 

Principal Prickly went off to the cafeteria to get some lunch. Then Lawson and Rachel peeked in. 

Lawson: Good! The coast is clear! 

Then Lawson and Rachel walked over to Principal Prickly's desk, and sat on Principal Prickly's chair. 

Lawson: We are going to rant on the Hingle slash Boulet relationship on the intercom.

Rachel: Good idea! But why? Because our rival Morris whomps and hangs out with one of the Ashleys. One of them is none other than Ashley B.

Lawson: Let's do it together! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Lawson rang the bell, and he and Rachel started announcing through the intercom.

Lawson: The Hingle slash Boulet relationship?! More like loser relationship! Oh my goodness! It sucks!

Rachel: I agree with Lawson! This whomps! F*** this relationship! Our rival Morris P. Hingle shall not be hanging out with one of the Ashleys.

Lawson: Which Ashley Morris hangs out with? Ashley B! Like her friends, she's snobby. Do you know that Morris used to be the new kid for three years until one of our enemies Gus Griswald came. Morris was no longer the new kid and got his name, and later, Gus got his name back, much to Morris' dismay. But Morris is now good friends with TJ and the Gang now. Morris had been called 'New Kid' for three years since the second grade, as he never stood up to King Bob. King Bob just accepted both Gus and Morris and let them have their names back. Screw King Bob! He's a stupid ruler!

Rachel: I agree! Morris should stay as  'New Kid', but King Bob stops us for saying something bad to him.

Lawson: And now, I've become a rival of Morris. Do you know who's the fifth grader? Morris Hingle!

Rachel: And who's the fourth grader? Ashley Boulet! Yes, she's stuck-up. Morris developed a crush on her since she saved her life from hitting the ground after our sixth-grade friend Eddie Pearson pushed her off the Jungle Gym when she substitutes for King Bob.

Lawson: Eddie hates Ashley B substituting for King Bob. Eddie's good friends with Penny's older brother Kenny and his friends Ted and Marvin. He, Kenny, Ted and Marvin are sixth graders and good friends with us. Eddie and his friends like to cause trouble for King Bob, his advisors and his servants. Morris is just a fifth grader like us and other fifth graders. He shall not fraternise with any fourth graders including our enemies TJ and the Gang. He is not allowed to fraternise with Ashley B ever!

Rachel: I agree! As long as Ashley B is a student of Third Street School, she will have nothing to do with our lousy rival!

Lawson: Yeah, when we take over King Bob's throne. We'll send him to the dodgeball wall! Morris is always smarter than we think, and he defends Ashley B. Morris has respect for the Ashleys, and we don't have respect for the Ashleys because they whomp.

Rachel: I agree! They're n******!

Lawson: Morris and Ashley B always hang out together. Like Gus who is one year older than Cornchip Girl, Morris is one year older than Ashley B.

Rachel: Like Cornchip Girl who is one year younger than Gus, Ashley B is one year younger than Morris. Unlike Morris and Ashley B, Gus and Cornchip Girl are both Caucasian like us.

Lawson: Also, we try to help Johnny Vernon Cutter go out with Spinelli and get them to become the Cutter slash Spinelli couple.

Rachel: But that stuck-up Detloser foiled Johnny V. Johnny V is well-behaved and he's a fifth grader like us, and Spinelli's a fourth grader. That TJ's a jerk, and he and Spinelli always hang out with each other.

Lawson: Morris is Caucasian, and Ashley B is African-American, which makes them the interracial couple. Morris and Ashley B are the worst interracial couple ever. And do you know who are the best interracial couple ever? Our 98th Street School counterparts Eric Dawson and Sasha Clark.

Rachel: Dawson is Caucasian, and Sasha is African-American. They're good friends with us. Dawson and Sasha wish they can take over Queen Barb's throne, be king and queen and rule the 98th Street School like we take over King Bob's throne, be king and queen and rule the Third Street School.

Lawson: We wish Dawson and Sasha to come visit our school and play with us. No one gives a s*** about the Hingle slash Boulet relationship.

Rachel: The Dawson slash Clark relationship is much more better than this abomination.

Lawson and Rachel: End of rant.

Suddenly, Ashley B came, and she was very angry.

Ashley B: Lawson and Rachel, what are you doing in Principal Prickly's office?!

Lawson: Um, me and Rachel were ranting on the Hingle slash Boulet relationship on the intercom because of you and Morris whomp.

Ashley B: Lawson and Rachel, how dare you rant on me, Morris and our relationship?! (in her TV voice) That is like so rude! (normal voice) I am very angry and upset at you. You have caused disgrace! You just hurt me and Morris with your rant!

Just then, Morris P. Hingle came with Principal Prickly.

Morris: There they are, Principal Prickly. It's Lawson and Rachel who ranted on me and Ashley B!

Ashley B: Principal Prickly, thank goodness you're here. Those fashion rejects have ranted on me, Morris and our relationship on the intercom!

Morris: That's what Ashley B said. Give them a talking to!

Principal Prickly: All right, Morris and Ashley B. Thanks for telling me. I'll have a word with them.

Morris: Thank you, Principal Prickly.

Principal Prickly: You're welcome.

Ashley B: Come on, Morris. Let's go to Old Rusty and relax. Thanks for sticking up for me.

Morris: And thanks for sticking up for me.

Morris and Ashley B left the office. Principal Prickly was very annoyed with Lawson and Rachel.

Principal Prickly: Lawson and Rachel, how dare you rant on Morris, Ashley B and their relationship on the intercom?! That's very rude of you all! You know Morris is a good boy and Ashley B is a good girl!

Lawson: But Principal Prickly, they whomp.

Rachel: I agree. They're both fashion rejects!

Principal Prickly: I don't care! Morris is a trustworthy kid, and he's a well-behaved fifth grader. But you two are badly-behaved fifth graders. Like all fourth graders, Ashley B is a well-behaved fourth grader, and so are her Ashley friends. That's it, you both are suspended for a week! Go home right now!

Lawson and Rachel went home in disgrace. Meanwhile, in the Third Street Playground, Morris was crying. Ashley B was seeing Morris feeling unhappy.

Ashley B: Morris, what's the matter?

Morris: Lawson and Rachel had been upsetting us, and they had been rude to us.

Ashley B: Don't worry, they're suspended. That's what they get for being rude about our relationship.

Ashley A: Ashley B, why is Morris crying?

Ashley B: Because Lawson and Rachel ranted on our relationship on the intercom.

Ashley A: Oh no! This is like an outrage. Randall had told Miss Finster so. Morris, come to our clubhouse. I'll make you feel better.

Morris: Thank you, Ashley A.

Back in Lawson's house, Lawson's dad was extremely with Lawson.

Lawson's dad: Erwin, how dare you rant on Morris, Ashley B and their relationship on the intercom?! You know it's very rude and unpleasant to do that! They're good kids!

Lawson: But dad, they whomp.

Lawson's dad: I don't care! You are grounded, grounded, grounded for a week! Go to your room now!

Lawson went to his room, crying.

Lawson: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Back in Rachel's house, Rachel's dad was extremely with Rachel.

Rachel's dad: Rachel, how dare you rant on Morris, Ashley B and their relationship on the intercom?! You know it's very rude and unpleasant to do that! They're good kids!

Rachel: But dad, they whomp.

Rachel's dad: I don't care! You are grounded, grounded, grounded for a week! Go to your room now!

Rachel went to his room, crying.

Rachel: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!


The audio featuring Ashley B saying "That is like so rude!" from the Recess episode Soccer Boy is used as an audio where she scolds Lawson and Rachel for ranting on the Hingle slash Boulet relationship on the intercom.

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